SAM JARED BONAR
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SAM JARED BONAR

sam writes

Wanda and Lefty 4/16/16

4/27/2016

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Lefty finished his janitor gig at the high school and walked to find some more work. He rolled his janitorial cart for a mile under the setting sun until he reached the boardwalk. There were always messes near there.

Lefty rolled up with his cart in the front, holding the mop handle to steer it up the boardwalk ramp. He rolled the castor wheels up to the door below the stairs that lead to the upper deck and knocked on the door.

"Yeah?" came muffled through the old door.

"Any messes?" Lefty replied.

"Awh, nothing I can't handle, Left," the voice left it at that.

"C.mon, Red. There's gotta be something nasty or delicate you can't do. How're your hands doin'?"

The door rattled and clicked open. Red's hands were shaking against the door's edge and the threshold to his office. It was a storage closet, really, with a school desk-chair combo squeezed into the side so the swinging door wouldn't hit it.

"I'm just fine, alright Left? Now, git! I got important business." Red slammed the door. Lefty muttered an old curse into the door's wood. He'd learned the curse from his Mah when he was 7 years old and she was 27. He was 58 now and she was dead.

Lefty had to get paid a little more tonight or his Wanda wouldn't get fed. She was pregnant with three beautiful babies all four of them (including Wanda) would be hungry when he got home.

He rolled his cart to a good spot near the railing, hit the wheel-lock on the cart, and reached underneath the trash-can section of the cart to pull out a large sketchbook. He also got 2 large sharpies (one fine, one thick) from the pocket on his coveralls and began to hustle.

"Miss! Miss, wouldn't you like a sketch of your and your man?" She walked on by, though. An older man heard his call a minute later.

"Do you do solos?" the brittle old man asked.

"Ah, well, sure, sir," but Lefty wasn't so thrilled because he'd probably want to pay less. "How much we talking?"

"$5," the old man replied. That's enough for Wanda and the unborn ones, probably only slim pickings for Lefty though. That's ok. Karma for getting to finish hustling so quick. Lefty nodded and set to work.

Lefty leaned his sketchbook against his cart while he made strong, quick strokes to form the man's large nose, receding chin, protruding second chin, warm and lonely eyes, strong face bones, and large ear lobes. Really, it took about 7 minutes or so.

The man was nice about it, though he was clearly hoping for more out of the final product. He handed Lefty a soiled 5 and walked off calmly towards the bathroom.

Lefty leaned for a minute on the boardwalk railing just to soak something in that day. It was a nice enough sunset that was totally over at this point. He stood straight again and grabbed the mop handle to wheel himself on home.

Wanda was tired when Lefty got home to the shed. She was laying on her side and her nipples were showing through the sheet. She bristled when lefty creaked the corrugated siding away from the door.

"Sorry, Wand. Rest your head now," Lefty cooed at his lover. She smiled and licked her chapped mouth. She moaned and begged for his attention. Lefty was a softie - he obliged without hesitation.

"I got you some of your favorites," he said as he reached her side. He pulled out a can of tuna and about five packets of Hellman's mayonnaise. He reached for the can opener above their resting place, deftly circled it around the tuna can, and dumped the contents on the ground in front of Wanda. Wanda's eyes lit up and her breath quickened.

Lefty smirked to himself as he opened each successive packet of mayo and squeezed it out onto the pile of oily tuna. When the fifth packet came, he used his finger to really get it all out. Then he straightened and bent the packet in order to use it for mixing. He stuck the crude spoon in and out of the tuna to really mix it up. When he finished mixing he throw the last packet of mayo to the trash pile and licked the globs of whiteness off his fingers.

Wanda and Lefty looked at each other for a few moments. Soft, without expectation.

Lefty gave a nod and Wanda went to goddamn town on that pile of tuna and mayo. Lefty laughed a predictable laugh.

He rubbed Wanda's forehead just a bit and softly moved his hands down her neck and to her shoulders where he started to remove the sheet. He pulled the sheet down to Wanda's belly, showing her swelling nipples to the shed's rusty air. He left the sheet there and moved his palm to her belly.

He felt three in there, alright. Might be even more. 
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Yisrael 4/15/16

4/27/2016

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"I'm a religious man, Walda! I'm a god-damn religious man.
I'm not sure what you expected of me, but it's pretty clear now that I can't deliver.
I'm not ashamed, either. Shame is worthless because it is human. Shame from God. Awe. That is true.
And if you cannot accept me, I will accept that but I will not accept it happily! I am a religious man! And I will not be silenced by you - in jest or in shame. I will hold my head high and pray and thank God for sending such a breathtaking test of my devotion. I will thank Him for not letting that waver.
Sure, I may cower in the corner and fight violently with my faith, but I will wrestle. Damn will I wrestle! I will not give in so easily, wander. I must wrestle with God. For you even if you do not care. Even when I lose to Him decisively and embarrassingly, I must do so. I must wrestle in front of all despite their apathy. 
​It is the only thing we were meant to do."
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TYKES Preview!

4/27/2016

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Do you hate reading? Been there. Well, I've got the solution. It's like a *podcast* (and those are popular!) but it's just me reading a preview of my story into your head. What a world!

If you want the whole story's audio, give me your email you shmuck! I'll send it out at week's end. I see you're quivering with antici....
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Eustace 4/14/16

4/22/2016

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Eustace fell out of the 5th dimension into a field in Northern Pennsylvania. He actually owned the field in 1691, but Eustace fell out of the 5th in 2016. So who knows who owned it now.

2016 wasn't so different from 1691, Eustace thought. Field looked the same except the wheat was taller and laid out in rows as perfect as can be.

Eustace tried to guess about the magics of the modern world, but he just ended up walking. North-east, he thought. Towards his old shack.

But the shack wasn't there. There was a tool shed where it used to be, but the tool shed was new. It wasn't Eustace's old home. He sighed. He'd figured, but still was nice to dream.

The shed had a lock so he left it be and wandered towards the creek in the woods. Wasn't too far. A quirk he hadn't thought of about time travel was it bringing him to the same time of year he had left in 1691: December 2nd. He wondered what was so special about years, anyway, that they changed while December 2nd stayed the same. Huh. Or, at least it felt like a December 2nd. 

Anyway, he found a trickle that his memory called the creek: just a couple of frozen puddles. Wasn't much of a creek before, he guessed. Especially not in early winter. So he left it be, too.

Eustace caught sight of a rock he knew well but it had a shiny circle on the upper side of it. Eustace investigated.

He didn't know much reading but Eustace knew his letters and numbers, being a businessman and all. There were some words running around the circle he couldn't make out, but he could read the stuff in the center. "USGS 1936 No. 1" And there was a triangle with a line in it, too.

Hm. Looked nice. Felt nice, too, when Eustace gave it a soft stroke. 

Well, he'd have to make camp soon and it was already pretty cold. He'd have to make a proper shelter soon, what with winter on it's way in and his shack gone nowadays. But for now, he walked ten feet to another large rock he knew well that used to be on the edge of the creek. He made a sort of leaf bed up next to it and laid down in it. He gathered some more leaves around him to cover him up a bit.

He curled around the rock and spooned it for the night. Luckily, nothing really bothered him till morning.

(to be continued)
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bUT, pLEASE? 4/13/16

4/21/2016

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"Don't be scared, Willie. Mommy'll catch ya!"
"I ain't scared! I'm waiting."
"Well, whatcha waitin' on Will? The dern tree is unstable! Just jump on down into Mommy's arms."
"I WILL... I will. Just, in a bit. Come back in a little."
"Willie, I am not leaving you here while your life is swinging on an old rotten fig tree. This dern tree's given me grief on grief over the years and I ain't lettin' it give me the ultimate grief! Not today, tomorrow, or never! No, sir."
"Momma, whatchu talking about?"
"DERNIT, Willie. I'm talking 'bout you! Just, oh Lord WATCH WHERE YOU STEPPIN'! Oh, Lord! Oh, ok, Ohhhh. Ok, just. Just a little easy jump. I always catch you safe and sound, don't I?"
"Yeah, but. But I just kinda wanna try it on my own, Momma... Ok?"
"Ohh..... dernit, Willie. Will ya just, just be a little careful. Or a lot careful, actually! A LOT, now y--"
"YEAH, Momma. I'll be CAREFUL! Ok?"
"Ohh. Ok."
"You gotta get outta the way or we'll both get hurt."
"I really don't wanna, Willie."
"I know, Momma. But, please?"

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Just some Storem starts 4/12/16

4/21/2016

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"Nothing you can't slice a knife with."

"Walk for failure, walk for side-notes."

"Sail the way to Magic Mile!"

"Don't be fearful, Willie, Mom'll catch ya!"

"After day light's finished, we all shut down."

"Twice an heirloom, it's been in my mother's chest for decades"

"Squeaky clean, is what I'll call you."

"Poke the Raptor. Write down your injuries."

"Don't slip on the clown vomit!"

"Never stop a mailman's journey."

"Never bleed a heartless whisper until you literally can't even."

"Then, my dear Walda, I will cower in the corner with my shame! I'm a religious man, WALDA!"
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Basic (unfinished) 4/11/16

4/21/2016

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Raychelle wanted nothing more than to be basic. It would be a lie, of course. Her parents couldn't pay the rent, her clothes had holes put there by wear (not the clothing stores), and she wasn't allowed to have makeup at home. She was anything but.

BettyAnne and her crew of little ladies had just figured this out. Raychelle's dad had heard about the mean little ladies and couldn't stop himself from intervening last week.

"Where's your daddy now, RaySHIT!" BettyAnne yelled at her after last period when Raychelle was going to track practice. BettyAnne was a rich-pisser. Her mom was a doctor and her dad had money from awhile ago. Family money only seems to grow. "Heard that asshole is gonna go to jail for what he did to me!" BettyAnne sniffed in the tear that was begging to come out
and shrugged her shoulders.

Raychelle found her voice, but it had nothing nice to say, "He'll get out and fuck you up again you BITCH!"

Oh, that was the wrong thing to say. The little ladies were on Raychelle immediately. They pinned her arms behind her back and grabbed her ponytail and pulled it back so she had to look down to see forward.

"He's NEVER coming out! Your daddy's a deadbeat, a taker, and an evil bad man and he's gonna die in prison if my daddy's got anything to s--"

Raychelle swung her leg up and kicked BettyAnne right in the pussy. It didn't hurt like balls, but it hurt. But BettyAnne was more shocked and sore than hurt. She sputtered in disgust as her little ladies lost their grip and looked for guidance. Raychelle wriggled out and began to run away. But before she was too far, she turned around to spit a sassy, "Grow a pair, maybe you'll feel something next time!" and spun away.

BettyAnne shoved away her ladies. She rose holding her crotch. "Why'd she get AWAY?1 You SLUTS!" But she didn't really care, she just didn't like that she looked bad. She wanted to sit down.

Raychelle, meanwhile, kept running. No one was chasing her, but she was running fast! And it felt good to run. She found herself off campus in the wildflower field before she knew it.

She'd never been camping before. It felt like a basic thing to do. So she laid down in the flowers on her side and felt her heart keep running. She heard the bell signalling the start of after-school activities, but she didn't get up. Her heart soon cooled to a light jog and the May sun lulled her to sleep.

​In her sleep, she wept and was so, so happy she could cry. It was a short nap, but resting. She woke to find the day ending and her legs sore in a bad way. She should've stretched.
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Just to Piss Me Off 4/10/16

4/13/2016

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"Just don't say things JUST to piss me off, ok, Ray? No, I'm serious! Goddamnit, I am! If you have one, even just one other measly fucking reason you are saying something - that's fine. Alright? Just. Just don't say something SOLELY to piss me off.

"I can't fucking STAND you sometimes."
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Mulch (unfinished) 4/9/16

4/13/2016

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"Well, it certainly wouldd be nice if we didn't have to pick up the mulch today. Can't you do that on your own?" Harry smiled without his teeth.

"Well, it's just 5 minutes out of the way." Essa promised from the driver's seat and made the left turn away from their house.

They rode in silence. It was miserable. They arrived at the mulch place. Essa got out of the car and walked towards the great pile of mulch. The parking lot of the mulch place was totally empty. It must be because it's a Sunday, Harry thought.

Essa got back in the car and slammed the door shut. 

"No mulch..." Harry shook his head and furrowed his brow. He opened his palm to Essa like it was her turn to talk.

"Just wanted to make sure it was available." Harry's eyes widened. Essa went on, "It was. Is."

Harry fumed and slammed his fist on the horn for like 4 seconds. He looked back at his girlfriend and said it. She agreed, but couldn't say it back. 

They had to sign a new lease in less than a week.
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Don't let it all seem so hard now 4/8/16

4/8/2016

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Mina had wanted to live many lives but she couldn't choose. She had wasted all her time setting herself up to be so damn ready when the opportunity struck. But she never went out and found the opportunity.

She was ready now, but now she wasn't anxious. Some anxiety could've helped her. She ended up happy with a woman who loves her very much. They're comfortable. It's all so reasonable.

She's living part of her dream, really. Not all of them, but she's living the roughest sketch of dream town. Why did she want more? How could she? It felt like she should. Could she still pull it off?

It all seems so hard now.
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